The importance of putting your baby down awake.

Why do I need to put my baby down awake? Is it necessary?

Yes! It’s absolutely necessary! There are no hard fast rules to this, but you really want to find a good balance between holding your baby all day and possibly all throughout the night and putting them down awake for naps and bedtime and of course throughout the day during their awake time.

Putting your baby down throughout the day will help get them used to the idea of being put down in the first place. If you have a baby who is held all day, chances are they’re going to have a tough time being put down at all, during the day and at bedtime. So I’d really focus on doing that here and there as mentioned in the post to help them get used to the world around them outside of your arms.

Doing this throughout the day is great practice for them leading up to naps and bedtime. The more you get them used to being put down during the day, the easier a time they’ll have come bedtime. They will already have had tons of practice being put down and the confidence to be on their own in the crib and it will be less of a shock to them when you put them down awake.

What to do if your baby is used to being put down fast asleep in the crib:

I got you. This is so intimidating, especially for babies who are used to going to going down fast asleep. I assure you, they can learn to sleep! When it comes to putting them down in their crib for sleep, start by putting your baby down more on the drowsy side for a few days and slowly start putting baby to sleep more and more awake.

You can hang out with your baby or leave the room and see what happens, it’s up to you. But he will get the hang of it and eventually be able to fall asleep totally independently In the crib.

My baby screams the second I put her down awake in the crib. What do I do?

I know it’s not easy, I know you’re really frustrated, I know you’re wondering “what’s the point?” I know you’re wondering how long it’ll take and if my baby will ever learn…

I know you’re thinking and feeling a lot of things. And I’m here to reassure you that your baby’s response to you putting them down awake is NORMAL. It’s expected. It’s exactly what I tell parents it would be. 

Your baby is just as confused as you are, and has no idea where they are when put down awake, they’re used to falling asleep in the cozy confines of your arms or in a stroller or wherever. 

Putting them down awake makes them feel like a fish out of water. You can’t expect to put your baby down and get smiles and giggles out of them. You can’t expect them to just lay their head down happily and just doze off. 

There’s going to be some resistance, some confusion, some tears. This is normal! 

But don’t give up! It takes time. The more your baby gets used to being put down awake, the more ok they will be with it, the more used to it they will be, the less crying there will be and the easier they’ll fall asleep.

It will pay off in the end, so hang tight and keep practicing! Read below for some helpful tips to help your baby ease into the idea of being put down wide awake in the crib and in general throughout the day.

What is the problem with putting my baby down fast asleep?

This is such a great question!

There are a few reasons why it’s problematic to put your baby down fast asleep, but here are the main reasons:

  1. Putting baby down fast asleep causes micro naps. Micro naps are one of the most overlooked sleep disturbances. The reason we want to avoid them is because a micro nap gives your baby just enough of an energy boost to stay awake, have trouble falling asleep and setting that sleep pressure back. This is why I always recommend avoiding putting your baby down ‘drowsy but awake’. The problem with drowsy but awake essentially means that your baby has entered their first stage of sleep and has dozed off right before being put down.

  2. Because it does not allow your baby learn how to fall asleep independently. If your baby falls asleep in your arms and is then transferred to the crib, he is going to need your help falling back asleep the same way, every single time he wakes up! You want them to be alert, awake and aware when being put down so that they can familiarize themeslves with their sleep space and learn to fall asleep on their own.

So bottom line is: Start putting them down BEFORE they enter this drowsy state and start teaching them how to fall asleep independently by putting them down awake with eyes open and alert.

Read the full blog here about micro naps and about putting your baby down awake.

Why does my baby wake up the second they’re put down in the crib?

Here are the top 5 reasons reasons why your baby is waking up as soon as they’re set down…

1. They may have been put down too drowsy. Try putting them down awake, not drowsy!

2. They may have triggered the startle reflex upon being set down. Swaddle babies 3 months and under. 

3. They are likely dependent on a sleep prop and unable to fall asleep unassisted. Start encouraging independent sleep.

4. They may have been put down too abruptly, causing them to jerk awake. Try gently rolling them from their side to their back. This is less abrupt.

5. They may not have had enough to eat and are still hungry . Make sure your baby is getting proper, full feedings throughout the day to ensure good sleep and growth.

Here are some helpful tips to get your baby used to being put down:

  1. Practice coming and going.

    Whenever you put your baby down, whether in the crib or during awake time on the play mat, practice coming and going to help your baby get comfortable with you leaving the room.

    Each time upon returning, tell your baby that “mommy always comes back.” Allow him to trust that you will return and over time, he will be ok with you not being there at every second. This will help with sleep as well!

  2. Put your baby down  awake in the crib

    Start by putting him down more drowsy for a few days and slowly start to put him down more and more awake. He will get the hang of it and eventually learn how to fall asleep on his own in the crib.

  3. Put your baby down on a play mat


    It's a great way for them to explore the environment around them independently and freely. It will also get them used to not being held all day.

  4. Put baby in a stroller or bouncy seat.

    Spend quality time with your baby while they sit next to you. Talk to your baby as you do chores or make dinner & check in to tell them that you're there.

  5. spend quality time with your baby in their room.

    Spend a few minutes each day during their awake time and in the evening before bedtime playing with your baby in his/her room. This will help familiarize them with the space they're sleeping in.

If you’ve read this blogpost and thought, wow, it seems like I can never hold my baby, think again. It does not mean you can't hold or snuggle your baby as much as you want during the day or before bedtime. There are no rules to this, so cash in on those cuddles whenever you feel like it, but also know that you don't have to feel guilty for wanting to put your baby down at some point, too.

It’s about finding the right balance between holding your baby too much, knowing when yo put them down and knowing that it’s ok to put them down. You will both benefit from this.

Does your baby scream the second they’re put down?

If you have questions and concerns about your child’s sleep, feel free to send me a message or book a free discovery call so that I can answer all of your questions.

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Wake windows

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Benefits of an earlier bedtime