What I Wish Every Postpartum Mama Knew

Dear postpartum mama,

I have been where you are.

I know this season is hard, and I know you may feel like you’re lost in the trenches of it all. Like you’re giving everything—but losing yourself along the way.

I remember how heavy the exhaustion felt.
How I wondered if I’d ever feel like myself again.
How some days just felt impossible.
How I felt I would never adapt to the changes.
How the hard days felt endless.

But know this: you will find your way again.

This version of you? She’s still growing. Still becoming.
You are not broken—you’re transforming.

And you don’t have to do it alone.
I’m here to remind you that you’re not the only one feeling this way—and that brighter days are coming.

So hold on tight to hope, and hold onto yourself too.
You matter. You’re doing beautifully.
And you will rise again.

After having four babies of my own and walking through four very different postpartum journeys, I’ve learned this: postpartum isn’t just about healing physically. It’s a complete unraveling and rebuilding—of your body, your identity, your relationships, and your routines.

So if you’re in it right now—if you’re tired, touched out, tearful, and unsure—I see you. And you’re not alone.

I remember what it felt like, too.

The exhaustion. The constant feeding, soothing, holding.
The 2 a.m. questions that echo through a quiet, dark room:
Am I doing this right? Will it always feel this heavy?

That newborn phase can feel never-ending—like time has both slowed down and sped up all at once.

Your body is healing. Your world has completely shifted.
You’re learning to care for someone entirely new… while also trying to care for yourself.

And that’s no small thing.

There’s a quiet kind of strength required in this season—one that often goes unseen.
You’re stretched, emotionally and physically. You’re growing, learning, giving, becoming.

It’s no wonder you feel like you’re carrying so much.
Because you are.

But here’s the truth I want you to hold onto:
The fog lifts.
Your baby grows.
You begin to find your rhythm.
You celebrate little wins.
And eventually, you start to feel like you again.

You won’t always feel this tired.
You’ll still be needed—but in softer, more manageable ways.
And even now, in the hardest parts, you are doing an incredible job… even if it doesn’t feel that way yet.

Yes, this season is heavy.
But it’s also shaping you in powerful, quiet ways—one day and one night at a time.

Here’s what truly helped me survive those early days:

1. Ask for Help

I know it’s not always easy. But it’s necessary. Whether it’s your best friend, your mom, your neighbor—someone wants to help. Let them. Don’t wait until you’re drowning to reach out. You deserve support now, not just when everything falls apart.

2. Focus on Feedings + Routine

Creating a simple eat-play-sleep rhythm brought me a sense of control when everything felt chaotic. It gave my days structure, and that small bit of predictability helped calm my nervous system and my mind. It wasn’t about perfection — just rhythm.

3. Ignore the Small Stuff

The dishes can wait. The toys on the floor will still be there tomorrow. Your healing, your mental health, and your connection with your baby matter more than a perfectly clean house. Give yourself permission to let go. Let "good enough" be enough for now.

4. Rest When You Can

No, you don’t have to sleep when the baby sleeps. But I did go to bed early most nights—right when the baby did. Even one longer stretch of rest changed everything. Rest is survival. Don’t apologize for needing it.

5. Have Something to Look Forward To

A warm coffee. A slow walk in the sunshine. A solo Target run. Getting your nails done. These small joys saved me. Don’t wait until postpartum is "over" to find happiness again—sprinkle it in, wherever you can. You deserve to feel like you, even now.

6. Date Your Spouse

It doesn’t have to be a big night out. A quiet coffee or a walk around the block can go a long way in helping you feel connected again. Your relationship matters too—and healing together can be beautiful. Small reconnections make a big difference.

7. Take It One Day at a Time

The postpartum season can feel never-ending. When it all feels too big, zoom in. Focus on today. Celebrate the small wins (like getting dressed or making a sandwich). And if today was awful? Try again tomorrow. The good days will come.

What Postpartum Moms Really Need

Here’s the truth: she doesn’t need fixing. She doesn’t need more pressure or more ways to “do better.” She needs to be seen. Heard. Understood.

She needs support that’s real—not vague offers like “Let me know if you need anything.”

Support is:

• Showing up with food.

• Texting, “I’m at the store—what can I grab for you?”

• Folding her laundry while she holds the baby.

• Sitting beside her and saying, “This is hard—and you’re doing so well.”

Because the wrong words linger. They can make her feel like she should be coping better or feeling differently. But the right ones? They’re a warm hand on her back, saying: You’re not alone. You’re not doing it wrong. And no—you’re not broken.”

The moms who are in it?
They remember who made them feel safe.
Who didn’t rush them through the hard parts.
Who didn’t disappear after the baby came.

“You’re not broken. You’re not alone. You’re doing your best.”

We remember the people who made us feel safe. Who didn’t rush us through the hard. Who stayed.

So if you’re deep in the thick of it right now, please know: this isn’t forever. The fog will lift. Your strength will return. And little by little, you’ll come back home to yourself.

You are not doing it wrong. You are simply doing something incredibly hard. And you’re doing it with so much love.

Keep going, mama.
You are more held than you know.

If you have questions and concerns about your baby’s sleep, feel free to send me a message or click here to book a free discovery call so that I can answer all of your questions.